Airline food: expensive for what it is and generally not blood-sugar friendly. Solution: bring your own. Seems fairly logical -- I pack whatever works for me into a reasonably sized bag or, alternatively, I buy something from an airport vendor. Either way, I board the aircraft with my meal. Shouldn't be difficult.
About 5:45 a.m. Monday, I approached the gate for my flight out of Seattle as I have many times before. On my person: one rolling suitcase of appropriate carry-on size, extender zipper properly closed; backpack containing toiletries, medications, laptop, and other TSA inspectables; and one meal-sized bag. I'll admit it up front -- the contents of the bag were not to be consumed on this flight, but they were readily identifiable food: two boxes of crackers that Almost Dr. Sis can't get easily where she lives (see above). They were a gift for her.
Gate Agent: (as he scans CT's ticket) "Have a good flight."
CT: "Thanks." CT starts walking toward jet bridge with her luggage. Gate Agent takes the next passenger's ticket then notices that his machine is indicating something from the previous scan.
Gate Agent: (to CT) "Wait, you're in an exit row. Are you willing to assist?"
CT: (turning from jet bridge door) "Yes."
Gate Agent: (notices paper bag in CT's hand) "Oh, you can't have three bags."
CT: (raises paper bag such that contents are visible): "This is food."
Gate Agent: (with a withering look) "Yeah, but you're not really going to eat all those crackers, are you?"
Now, at that moment, I have to say I was a bit taken aback. First of all, if I'd been carrying, say, a McDonald's bag of the same size, would you, Mr. Gate Agent, have bothered to question me about my baggage count? Secondly, what business was it of yours whether I was going to eat the entirety of what was in said bag? Food is food is food. As far as I know, your airline allows people to bring their own meals onto the plane and doesn't limit the type of food they purchase in any way. Sure, Manchu Wok is kind of gross to contemplate at 6 a.m., but you're operating a flight that lands in a time zone two hours ahead of this one. If I wanted lunch at 11:00 CST to adjust to the switch, it wouldn't be strange for me to have containers of General Tso's Chicken and Black Mushroom Tofu on hand since your flight doesn't reach its destination until nearly 12:30. But oh right, if I'd been holding a bag from a commercial food vendor, you wouldn't have blinked.
So, Mr. Gate Agent. I don't appreciate your rolling your eyes at me one little bit. For the record, not one of the flight attendants had any problem with the bag in question as it fit under the seat in front of me anyway, along with my backpack.
Just because I had my camera handy once I did manage to get myself some lunch at O'Hare, allow me to offer you a visual aid:
McDonald's sack containing a salad and a small cup of water.
Same McDonald's sack vs. bag containing two boxes of crackers.
Tell me, Mr. Gate Agent -- what, besides your attitude, is wrong here?
12 comments:
You must be flying nice airlines--I've gotten used to the budget airlines here in Europe which will not let you even pass through security with more than one carry on bag, total. Your purse, your lunch, your toiletries, your computer, anything you might possibly need on the flight (even medicine if you need it) has to fit into one bag. They also limit the bag not just by volume, but they also say that it must be less than 10kg. I haven't yet had them actually stop to check if my bag is within that mass requirement, but other people I know have.
Oh my -- I had read about the tight restrictions in Europe not too long ago. You must be very creative at suitcase space management!
Thanks for stopping by :)
And as far as he knew, you were going to eat it in the GATE! And what business of his is it whether or not you eat all of those crackers? I'm sitting here trying to think of witty/alarming comebacks about crackers, eating, binging, etc. Maybe something like, "As a matter of fact, to deal with the frustrations of air travel, I must have something on which to grind my teeth. Therefore, I'll be eating two crackers per minute until they are gone."
Whaaaa? Assholery! Brazen Assholery! How dare he question your crackers? grrrr.
GEW -- ha! I love it! And those crackers would actually be perfect for tooth-grinding. They're full of tasty seeds and hold up to hummus or peanut butter better than anything I've ever tried.
TKW -- assholery indeed!!! After I'd landed, I considered for a split second whether I should open the boxes and pull out the sealed packets they were in to send the empty cardboard portions back to Seattle on a returning plane with an unsuspecting flight attendant. "Hey, would you mind giving these to the gate agent at A9? It's a private joke we've got going -- he'll get a kick out of it when he gets these ... "
I haven't flown for a while...things sure have gotten strict! Thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting. I had childhood issues as well...forgiveness and acceptance are the first steps to allowing yourself to find your own self worth...then you're able to love yourself and others and there you will find peace. I'm not saying that it is a short and easy process. It has taken me time, but I wouldn't trade this feeling to go back to who I was for anything.You'll reach it.
Hi, SuziCate -- thanks for coming by too. I appreciate the encouragement, am looking forward to getting where you've gotten. And to reading more of your writing :)
I think that some TSA agents use their position of relative, situational power to laud it over the travelers who pass through their checkpoints. I recently saw a TSA agent berate a mother traveling with two kids because she hadn't taken the booties off of her baby before going through the metal detector. Nice. (Of course, most TSA agents I've encountered are extremely kind and helpful, but there are always the exceptions that make for good writing fodder!)
I love your blog and the concept behind it. So glad to find your writing through your comment on TKW's guest post at my place.
Thanks!
Hi, Kristen -- thanks for visiting. You are so right about that special kind of TSA agent; it's an unfortunate power trip thing. That poor mother!
Glad you like the blog :). I'm slowly expanding my circle of writers I follow, and TKW has been instrumental in introducing me to some lovely people (thanks again, TKW!). I'm looking forward to catching up on the goings-on at Motherese.
Put good tasty crackers in a rubbish food bag and it's just fine and dandy, eh? We call people like that 'jobsworths' over in the UK (as in, 'it's more than my job's worth to let you do etc etc').
Glad you got them through though.
Oh - and it's March 2nd. You?
x
p.s - silly me not realising the recipe had a link (which I've just printed out, It sounds lovely and I'm going to get a cauli tomorrow.
Yay, FF! The capers are essential.
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