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Body: in sickness and in health
More recently, illness, pure but not simple, has added itself to the mix in a multi-system sort of way. And the challenges in figuring out exactly what's gone wrong are many. As problems have revealed themselves in the last few years, beginning with reactive hypoglycemia in late 2008, I've documented them here, partly to gain a little clarity on managing complex conditions but mostly to give voice to vulnerabilities I feel but don't normally share with anyone face to face. Better out than in, they say, right? (Oh yes, humor is one way I deal.)
The links below cover the different angles I've examined (and from which I've been examined) within that experience.
Travel: neither here nor there
Since we're no longer in separate places, I blog less often from airports. But we do travel -- together now! -- which is much more fun to write about. So in addition to thoughts on our years of commuting, the links below cover the places we've been as a pair and, in some cases, the adventures that have happened on the way.
Writing: the long and short of it
After graduating, I taught English for a few years and then worked as an editor, which I still do freelance. In 2007, I applied and got into an MFA program at a place I like to call Little U. on the Prairie. I finished my degree in 2011 and have been balancing tutoring and writing on my own ever since.
The following links cover the writing I've done about writing: process, content, obstacles, you name it. It's not always pretty. But some part of me loves it, even when it's hard. And this is the result.
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Why My Fall Made Me Feel So Ashamed11 months ago
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Mantras1 year ago
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Things Fall Apart3 years ago
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#MudpunchKAL20213 years ago
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Your Hard is Hard (The Pandemic Version)4 years ago
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Thank you, and a Look Ahead5 years ago
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A New Chapter9 years ago
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Overnight Research Trip9 years ago
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how to get through a thing10 years ago
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Heart: family and friends
That's what this group of posts is reserved for -- heart. The essential parts of my life whose influences I carry with me, for better or worse. The links below cover what I've written as I've learned how these forces work within me, for me, against me, in spite of me. They anchor me even as they change me, and they keep life interesting.
Recommended reading
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
$%!#
For one, I needed a break from thinking about it. And I certainly didn't want this space to become all medical, all the time. Then the diagnosis, while a diagnosis, was still preliminary, so I didn't want to jinx it by talking about it -- I figured I'd get my prescriptions filled (a combination of antibiotics and probiotics), start treatment, and await the results before mentioning anything here. Things were looking good too! No nasty GI symptoms for a week and a half. I was stoked.
But this morning, I woke up to a gastrointestinal mutiny.
What the hell happened??? Of course my brain shifted into analytical mode and started counting off possible causes. Last night's leftovers? (Not likely, barely two days old, quite properly refrigerated, and without effect on D.) Side effects of the antibiotics? (Doesn't make sense -- wouldn't they have made themselves known early on?) How about the shellfish from two weekends back. (Again, doubtful, given the time lag.) That leaves -- uh oh.
Did I mention we picked up two foster kitties on Friday? And that one of them recently tested positive for giardia? I had no idea until after I'd gotten them home and had time to read their medical files thoroughly. Kitty's been treated, but still. Gulp.
I've always been very, very careful about handwashing after handling any of our fosters. These parasites, however, are especially tenacious -- you have to boil them to death. Unfortunately, as much as I'd like to, I cannot plunge my hands into boiling water every time I finish grooming our furry guests or scooping their litter.
Please, after these last nine months of GI evil, let me not have gotten giardia.
The problem is that its symptoms, from what I've read, are essentially indistinguishable from malabsorption resulting from other causes (the issue I had to begin with). In my case, Dr. Specialist was guessing I had a bacterial imbalance in my small intestine. And a significant reduction in symptoms after this course of antibiotics would mean he was probably right.
But now, now there's this new variable. Possibly throwing off this test, as it were. Does it mean further months of not knowing for sure what's wrong? Are we going to be playing the watch and wait game all over again? And which doctor am I supposed to call -- Dr. Specialist, who is nearly impossible to get hold of because of the system he works within, or my local GI guy, who seems to be a bit more conservative (read: in no rush to get an answer) in his diagnostic approach?
I know, I'll call both -- Dr. Specialist first thing tomorrow and as many times as is reasonable (it's too late in the day to reach him now). If no answer after a day or so, I'm moving on to local GI guy. That's the best I can do. I just wish I could do something more in the here and now to help me feel less frustrated.
Well, in a way, I suppose I already have. I bought myself some potted gerbera daisies last week because they caught my eye at the grocery store. Took them directly to our bathroom, our makeshift spa for plants. They're hanging out at the edge of the tub, the first thing I see whenever I walk in there.
In hindsight (yep, back to the poop humor again), flowers were a great idea.
Thesis
- "Writing in My Father's Name: A Diary of Translated Woman's First Year" in Women Writing Culture
- Because I Remember Terror, Father, I Remember You
- Darkroom: A Family Exposure
- Do You Remember Me?: A Father, a Daughter, and a Search for the Self
- Five Thousand Days Like This One
- Giving Up the Ghost
- Middlesex
- Simple Recipes
- The Bishop's Daughter
- The Possibility of Everything
- The Wounded Storyteller: Body, Illness, and Ethics
- Where the Body Meets Memory: An Odyssey of Race, Sexuality and Identity
On commuter relationships
- Commuter Marriages: Worth the Strain?
- Dual Career Couples: The Travails of a Commuter Marriage
- I Was in a Commuter Marriage
- Long-Distance Marriages, Better for Business?
- Love on the Road, Not on the Rocks
- Making Marriage Work from a Distance
- Survival Tips for Commuter Couples
- Ten Things Commuter Couples Need to Know
- Till Work Do Us Part
- Two Cities, Two Careers, Too Much?
Posts by label
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
$%!#
For one, I needed a break from thinking about it. And I certainly didn't want this space to become all medical, all the time. Then the diagnosis, while a diagnosis, was still preliminary, so I didn't want to jinx it by talking about it -- I figured I'd get my prescriptions filled (a combination of antibiotics and probiotics), start treatment, and await the results before mentioning anything here. Things were looking good too! No nasty GI symptoms for a week and a half. I was stoked.
But this morning, I woke up to a gastrointestinal mutiny.
What the hell happened??? Of course my brain shifted into analytical mode and started counting off possible causes. Last night's leftovers? (Not likely, barely two days old, quite properly refrigerated, and without effect on D.) Side effects of the antibiotics? (Doesn't make sense -- wouldn't they have made themselves known early on?) How about the shellfish from two weekends back. (Again, doubtful, given the time lag.) That leaves -- uh oh.
Did I mention we picked up two foster kitties on Friday? And that one of them recently tested positive for giardia? I had no idea until after I'd gotten them home and had time to read their medical files thoroughly. Kitty's been treated, but still. Gulp.
I've always been very, very careful about handwashing after handling any of our fosters. These parasites, however, are especially tenacious -- you have to boil them to death. Unfortunately, as much as I'd like to, I cannot plunge my hands into boiling water every time I finish grooming our furry guests or scooping their litter.
Please, after these last nine months of GI evil, let me not have gotten giardia.
The problem is that its symptoms, from what I've read, are essentially indistinguishable from malabsorption resulting from other causes (the issue I had to begin with). In my case, Dr. Specialist was guessing I had a bacterial imbalance in my small intestine. And a significant reduction in symptoms after this course of antibiotics would mean he was probably right.
But now, now there's this new variable. Possibly throwing off this test, as it were. Does it mean further months of not knowing for sure what's wrong? Are we going to be playing the watch and wait game all over again? And which doctor am I supposed to call -- Dr. Specialist, who is nearly impossible to get hold of because of the system he works within, or my local GI guy, who seems to be a bit more conservative (read: in no rush to get an answer) in his diagnostic approach?
I know, I'll call both -- Dr. Specialist first thing tomorrow and as many times as is reasonable (it's too late in the day to reach him now). If no answer after a day or so, I'm moving on to local GI guy. That's the best I can do. I just wish I could do something more in the here and now to help me feel less frustrated.
Well, in a way, I suppose I already have. I bought myself some potted gerbera daisies last week because they caught my eye at the grocery store. Took them directly to our bathroom, our makeshift spa for plants. They're hanging out at the edge of the tub, the first thing I see whenever I walk in there.
In hindsight (yep, back to the poop humor again), flowers were a great idea.
16 comments:
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I believe that this post gives me an opportunity to whip out one of my mom's favorite sayings: "No good deed goes unpunished."
I'm sorry your kindness to the kitties has left you with a string of concerns. I hope you get the answers you're looking for - and soon. - March 30, 2010 at 9:50 PM
- Bev said...
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OH NO, GIARDIA??
- March 30, 2010 at 10:12 PM
- French Fancy... said...
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Oh CT, this is such a shame - although I have to confess to never having heard of Giardia and I am about to leave this box to google it...
(pause)
OMG, I've just read the Wiki page - the thing is that it sounds like so much else of a similar nature. Are you sure it would tbe this and not a straight forward tummy bug (is there such a thing though)?
This sounds just like me when I was getting over my gall bladder removal. I'm sorry to turn this into me me me - but medical sites do make one stop and think. They can also make one exceedingly paranoid.
I do hope this passes soon - I guess they checked out your gall bladder though... - March 31, 2010 at 2:45 AM
- hgg said...
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Oh noes, that's not fair. Hope you figure out what it is before too long this time
- March 31, 2010 at 3:29 AM
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Similar symptoms going on here for the past several months. Am putting off the inevitable -- getting tests done. Never heard of giardia -- need to go look it up! Hope you're feeling better soon and that's not it!
- March 31, 2010 at 5:34 AM
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You poor thing! Here's hoping the chaos in all areas of your life dies down soon!
- March 31, 2010 at 12:27 PM
- This Ro(a)mantic Life said...
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Kristen -- so would your mother be laughing wryly or just giving me the "I told you so" eye? Either way, the kitties would sidle up to her and rub their heads all over her ankles as if to say, "Who, us?"
Bev -- yeeeeeeeeeeah, think non-parasitic thoughts for me. (Obviously unconfirmed in my case but positive tests TIMES TWO for the tabby -- the first dose of meds didn't clean her out completely!) Sigh ... I'll do my best not to bring any germs to your kitty when I visit in a few months.
FF -- isn't that the nature of tummy bugs, too nonspecific ever to be straightforward :P. And don't worry! Totally not you, you, you; just thinking as you say. As for the gallbladder, nothing going on there as far as we know. Glad your problems resolved eventually after your surgery!
hgg -- hello! Been thinking about you. Hope things are better in Scotland than they were in January ...
Sherlock -- unless you've had any exposure to the bug via your pets (who would have exhibited symptoms too), I imagine it's unlikely that's the cause of your symptoms. So sorry to hear you've been dealing with that though. I will say I was glad to get some part of this preliminarily figured out even though the testing wasn't fun. The good thing is the majority of it can be done at home (no need for hospital stays). - March 31, 2010 at 12:36 PM
- This Ro(a)mantic Life said...
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Thanks, Jane! Just stopped at your place and got thinking about how what I know about my family history is inherently tied into its medical history (you start to remember it when you have to fill it out numerous times on clinic intake forms). How crazy is that?
- March 31, 2010 at 12:41 PM
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I hope you and the kitties are all better soon. I don't know what Giardia is , but I hope it's not bad. GI difficulties are among the worst. Hugs.
- March 31, 2010 at 5:30 PM
- This Ro(a)mantic Life said...
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Thanks, SuziCate. The good news at the moment is that the kitties are doing great. And they have very sweet personalities, so even if they did pass on a bug, I couldn't really be mad at them for long ...
- March 31, 2010 at 11:40 PM
- Good Enough Woman said...
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CT, Oh bugger. I hope that, whatever it is, it can be cleared up, out, or away.
Also, you are very talented when it comes to the poop humor. Well done. - April 1, 2010 at 11:18 PM
- This Ro(a)mantic Life said...
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I'm still thinking about that after-dinner poop-humor salon chez vous, GEW!
- April 2, 2010 at 12:22 AM
- hgg said...
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yeag, sorry for the silence. blogging is not on the top of the list these days. I read though. I read.
- April 3, 2010 at 5:54 PM
- This Ro(a)mantic Life said...
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No need to apologize, hgg. Glad to know you're out there.
- April 4, 2010 at 1:38 AM
- TKW said...
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NO! You need giardia like a hole in the head!
Are you any better? Any news? I am so sorry! - April 5, 2010 at 6:10 PM
- This Ro(a)mantic Life said...
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You know, TKW, a hole in the head would at least be some variety!
But in all seriousness, no, no appreciable change yet. I did get Dr. Specialist on the phone, but (as predicted), he can't really assess the mutiny until it's gone on for more than a day or two. (Since my call, it has, but he needs a week or two of self-monitoring on my part from the onset of symptoms.) So we watch, we wait, we take notes, and we give him our full report in a few days ... - April 5, 2010 at 6:39 PM
16 comments:
I believe that this post gives me an opportunity to whip out one of my mom's favorite sayings: "No good deed goes unpunished."
I'm sorry your kindness to the kitties has left you with a string of concerns. I hope you get the answers you're looking for - and soon.
OH NO, GIARDIA??
Oh CT, this is such a shame - although I have to confess to never having heard of Giardia and I am about to leave this box to google it...
(pause)
OMG, I've just read the Wiki page - the thing is that it sounds like so much else of a similar nature. Are you sure it would tbe this and not a straight forward tummy bug (is there such a thing though)?
This sounds just like me when I was getting over my gall bladder removal. I'm sorry to turn this into me me me - but medical sites do make one stop and think. They can also make one exceedingly paranoid.
I do hope this passes soon - I guess they checked out your gall bladder though...
Oh noes, that's not fair. Hope you figure out what it is before too long this time
Similar symptoms going on here for the past several months. Am putting off the inevitable -- getting tests done. Never heard of giardia -- need to go look it up! Hope you're feeling better soon and that's not it!
You poor thing! Here's hoping the chaos in all areas of your life dies down soon!
Kristen -- so would your mother be laughing wryly or just giving me the "I told you so" eye? Either way, the kitties would sidle up to her and rub their heads all over her ankles as if to say, "Who, us?"
Bev -- yeeeeeeeeeeah, think non-parasitic thoughts for me. (Obviously unconfirmed in my case but positive tests TIMES TWO for the tabby -- the first dose of meds didn't clean her out completely!) Sigh ... I'll do my best not to bring any germs to your kitty when I visit in a few months.
FF -- isn't that the nature of tummy bugs, too nonspecific ever to be straightforward :P. And don't worry! Totally not you, you, you; just thinking as you say. As for the gallbladder, nothing going on there as far as we know. Glad your problems resolved eventually after your surgery!
hgg -- hello! Been thinking about you. Hope things are better in Scotland than they were in January ...
Sherlock -- unless you've had any exposure to the bug via your pets (who would have exhibited symptoms too), I imagine it's unlikely that's the cause of your symptoms. So sorry to hear you've been dealing with that though. I will say I was glad to get some part of this preliminarily figured out even though the testing wasn't fun. The good thing is the majority of it can be done at home (no need for hospital stays).
Thanks, Jane! Just stopped at your place and got thinking about how what I know about my family history is inherently tied into its medical history (you start to remember it when you have to fill it out numerous times on clinic intake forms). How crazy is that?
I hope you and the kitties are all better soon. I don't know what Giardia is , but I hope it's not bad. GI difficulties are among the worst. Hugs.
Thanks, SuziCate. The good news at the moment is that the kitties are doing great. And they have very sweet personalities, so even if they did pass on a bug, I couldn't really be mad at them for long ...
CT, Oh bugger. I hope that, whatever it is, it can be cleared up, out, or away.
Also, you are very talented when it comes to the poop humor. Well done.
I'm still thinking about that after-dinner poop-humor salon chez vous, GEW!
yeag, sorry for the silence. blogging is not on the top of the list these days. I read though. I read.
No need to apologize, hgg. Glad to know you're out there.
NO! You need giardia like a hole in the head!
Are you any better? Any news? I am so sorry!
You know, TKW, a hole in the head would at least be some variety!
But in all seriousness, no, no appreciable change yet. I did get Dr. Specialist on the phone, but (as predicted), he can't really assess the mutiny until it's gone on for more than a day or two. (Since my call, it has, but he needs a week or two of self-monitoring on my part from the onset of symptoms.) So we watch, we wait, we take notes, and we give him our full report in a few days ...
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